A fixed page on the Astropolis portal, reserved for singing praises of the Lighthouse's heroic deeds and listing the latest villains they have taken down.
Under the Light of the Lighthouse
Good morning, Astropolis! No prizes for guessing: how many villains has our great hero "Lighthouse" taken down recently? We'll skip straight to the answer: a whopping thirty! From the coastline to downtown, from emerging threats to seasoned villains, Lighthouse has proven through action that in Astropolis, darkness is always just a temporary blip.
Foiling Shallows' Conspiracy At last month's beach seafood festival, "Shallows", a being capable of commanding marine life, emerged from the depths riding on a mosasaurus, determined to make off with all the seafood waiting to be cooked.
But, evil is defeated under the light of the Lighthouse. Lighthouse, who happened to be right there, casually picked up a rock and hurled it at the mosasaurus, knocking it out cold. Shallows made it to the shore in a sorry state, and was greeted by Lighthouse, happily chowing down on skewered squid.
Later, Lighthouse auctioned off that rock and donated all 500,000 credits to the Life Sciences Institute in support of their scientific research. ...
Justice Prevails over the Fool The classic villain Madam "Fool" makes her ninth return, using her superpowers to make every resident within a 5-kilometer radius of downtown suddenly forget what one plus one equals. The film High-IQ Criminal, which was being shot downtown at the time, ended up looking more like Low-IQ Idiot.
But, there is no place for villains to escape under the light of the Lighthouse. In no time, Lighthouse's laser eyes locked on to his target from a thousand miles out, and he flew straight to the scene, weapon in tow, and unleashed a devastating blow, shattering the intelligence-sapping field.
But how, you may be wondering, was Lighthouse not affected by the intelligence-sapping field? To that, experts explain: "Lighthouse upholds justice through instinct, without the need for complex thinking. Turns out that's the perfect immunity to the Fools' abilities." ...
Slowpoke's Scar New villain "Slowpoke" makes his debut with a bank heist. His slowing field reduces anything within his line of sight to move at a snail's pace — until a laser beam comes flying in from outside his field of vision.
That's right, no wrongdoing escapes judgment under the light of the Lighthouse. Just beyond the edge of Slowpoke's field of vision came the flash of Lighthouse's twin eyes. They launched a laser beam along a precise trajectory into the sky, which came streaking back down to strike Slowpoke square on the head, knocking him out cold on the spot.
Medical staff rushed Slowpoke to the hospital for emergency treatment, but it was too late. The scar on his head would stay there for the rest of his life. ...
The Hero Behind the Numbers 31 days, 30 criminals, 7,321 residents saved. 100% win rate maintained. Defeated the same villain with the same weapon for the ninth time. Presented with these stunning battle records, a dismissive Lighthouse says: "I only care about justice, not numbers." Let us pay our highest respects to Lighthouse.