An old tavern drink menu. The paper bears the marks of time.
Faded Drink Menu
Old pals, quit saying stuff like "Talking's making me thirsty. Just grab me any drink." That really hurts.
"The Fool's Tavern" and "Joke Brewing" were everyone's idea, remember? Our new drinksmith has just managed to make his first batch of drinks. We can't let his "laughter-cramped belly" go to waste.
First batch of drink menus is out. Just order off this from now on.
"Appetizer" Concocted from a blend of puns, wisecracks, and spur-of-the-moment humorous inspiration, it boasts a refreshing taste and a clean aftertaste that doesn't linger. It is the perfect diversion for an interstellar traveler on a quick break, or the prelude for the disheartened to drink the night away. ※ Despite being named "Appetizer," this is actually a beverage. This clever touch adds an exquisite note to its flavor, all thanks to that Nameless passerby.
"Old Salmon" A special brew of single-punchline cold jokes. Low laugh threshold, perfect for reunions with old friends. Aquatic notes, with a strong icy feel.
"Modern Art History" True to its name, it is brewed by mixing inspiration from modern installation art, performance art, and the news articles covering them. The taste is often described as "my grandma's fridge." Truly unforgettable.
"Chocoholic" Main ingredient: ██████████-type jokes. Contains chocolate-like ingredients. Mammal-like non-human patrons and accompanying pets, please order with caution.
"Ahahahahaha" A distilled blend of Aeon jokes widely circulated over hundreds of Amber Eras, infused with a dash of the latest memes, and aged in a barrel Aha once used for bowling. Every sip bursts with the fullness of IX, the independence of Xipe, the approachability of Mythus, and most importantly, the raw intensity of Nanook brawling with a rice cooker. ※ Woody notes. Order with caution if allergic to tree rings. Also, if you laugh a little too hard while chatting, our drinksmith might mistakenly assume you ordered this. If an accidental order does happen, we'll leave it off your tab, but you still have to finish the glass.
"Menu/Drink List/Beverage Menu" Brewed from meta jokes, self-referential humor, and "this very beverage menu." Tastes like berries. ※ All three names refer to the exact same drink. The drinksmith's intent is glaringly obvious. "Do you have a menu?" "We do." "Give me the menu." "Okay." "...?"
"Which One's the Worst? I'll Try It." Ingredients: Philosophical paradoxes. Too many Fools kept asking the exact same question, so an infuriated drinksmith invented this out of sheer spite. It's also known as "That Weird Thing." The drinksmith has no intention of trying it themselves, but rumor has it that it tastes a bit like "sweetened styrofoam." ※ If a patron refuses all other drinks and only orders this one, they are probably not a Fool, but a Mourning Actor in disguise. Feel free to kick them out. ※ Too many Fools are disguising themselves as Actors. Rule removed.
"Last One, For Real This Time. Call Me a Dog If I Drink More." A glass of plain water, containing zero joke ingredients. The patron must loudly announce the drink's full name, ensuring that over half the Fools currently in the tavern hear it clearly before the drinksmith will take the order. ※ Plain water in the tavern is only served in this manner. ※ You really will turn into a dog.